Experience through words
Disappointed the fountain was empty…much like life, it’s a lesson to learn; there will be disappointment, rejection, longing and fear. With sprinkles of joy, peace and elation. In spite of these attachments, because we are attached to our feelings, life’s mysteries are worth discovering, even when they lead to dead-ends and empty fountains.
You look up at the sky too much, wondering what will be. I’ve heard that. Lost amongst millions of forgotten lights, ghosts shimmering and floating amongst a vast pool of darkness, a mostly empty sea.
There is an indifference out there,
It shakes you
Haunts you
Befuddles you
If it wasn’t for this, where would you be? Should your focus be placed elsewhere? On the gods and their misplaced scourge? How much of our presence is required? Wondering what our place is in this speck of dust and mud we call earth.
– A. Garcia
They move as slow as melting clay
Left behind in a shimmering glare
Still I plot the days
Hoping for blue across the way.
– A. Garcia
I want to clear the way for a road; cobblestone streets or straight black tar pavement. How about a pristine dirt path that leads nowhere, yet fills you with joy. That sounds better. The sun and the moon our only guides. Perhaps a white-sand beach awaits, waves crashing rhythmically and inviting. Or maybe a morning dew amongst a lush, green forest, a lukewarm lake to swim and recollect. A nighttime dip, warm water hugging our forms, gazing at the stars, imagining the constellations don't seem so far. The destination is not important, no need for a map, as long as you take my hand to walk the lonely path.
How does, “let’s be alone together sound?”
We leave behind a wake of energy, quantum particles that exist here and there simultaneously. They might as well be on one of Jupiter's moons, same moment, same instance, existing across space and time. Is there such a force as the passing of time? With its relentless power, unwavering with no compassion. You will marvel at beauty and despair, see hope come and go like asteroids in the sky. It will trample over your deepest love and make your fears seem obsolete and mundane. What would we give for that hug that never materialized, to linger on your lips waiting for no tomorrow, and have a mole burrow deep taking with it traces of your pain. Hindsight will slap you in the face, the redness on your cheeks stinging, and while short-lived, the memory lingers on, red and hot in your mind, reeling at options left behind.
Time.
It comes for you and always finds a path, it knows, somehow it just knows. That's why we make roads, to leave marks behind, imprinted with the weight of time it took to take that step, until it fades away into the unknown, leaving memories that float around well beyond existence.
It’s all there to take but fear leaves you in a bind.
- A. Garcia
It feels like it’s been a while
Even a second is too long
A lifetime that fits in the micro
Why don’t you drop on by
And make me smile.
Oh! How you easily inspire
Levitating your energy close to mine
I didn’t ask for it,
A tree trunk fell on my head, and I realized
It was that damn smile.
– A. Garcia
No one is ever ready.
The sky is never perfectly blue, the night is never completely dark,
There is light when there is a shadow
A sprinkle of dust motes showing through a trace of light
It’s all there, present yet not seen
Readiness is an illusion
Circumstance hindering your sight
Yet your heart knows
Neurotransmitters sparking the message
The one the soul feels in spite of fright
Listen carefully
It’s all there, don’t be afraid
The earth is spinning
So is your mind
centrifugal forces push out and bring stability
Life is risk or stagnation
So hold on tight
We are on a journey towards salvation.
– A. Garcia
Tap, tap, there is a crack in the shell
Split open over a sizzling pan,
Butter bubbles burst in heat
Scrambled, flipped, or over-easy
Congratulations, you’ve made some eggs.
And that’s it, it’s a wonderful creation, in whichever form you decide to take it. What else could I possibly say.
– A. Garcia
I want to think of you, not dream of you. Dreams are subconscious and unintentional.
To think of you is to put intention forward.
It’s on purpose.
When you see something
When you see something
There it goes crossing your view again
Im looking at you, number eleven
You pop in and out of my vision
Even when I contemplate heaven
Twin stacks that seem sky-bound
Is there something you want to tell
Spit it out and at least make a sound
Is it a message
Is it a sign
Should I count my blessings?
I lay awake thinking what is it all about
In doubt I wait for something pleasant
What do you have in mind, number eleven?
-A.Garcia
There is a demon in my room. Every night, as I lay to sleep, it pulls on my awareness and drags me into a well that runs deep. Into the void I fall, the gentle embrace of darkness soaks me to the bone. Every night I expect to see a ghastly form, squinting me eyes to catch a glimpse of its ugly core. As much as I try, the demon never shows. All I see are shadows thrown about, all fractured and torn.
A whisper in my ear is all that I hear, “Don’t worry about seeing, as long as you can feel, shut your eyes, and just sleep some more. I will take you, every night my arms embrace your subtle form, and that cold you feel is your body detaching from its soul, just know one day your eyes will open no more”.
– A. Garcia
Maybe it’s better this way
a bird flying high and wide
Flight so fast the feathers ripple off leaving behind a trace of pain
And if you ever love me, let me know
there will always be a feather in me
To drop off when the wind dies down.
– A. Garcia
It happens, I feel it, my heart wants to burst with joy and climb up the highest tree.
Then, a cloud passes by, far-away fears long conquered pop in like thunder out of a perfectly blue sky.
And, as I search my soul and all I want is to hide in a black hole,
then she smiles at me.
- A. Garcia
I sit here and wait
It’s all a matter of patience
So I sit here and wait
Love is lost they say
So I sit here and wait
Should I sit and pray
Empty the brain and stop thinking
Fold my legs and meditate
Dwell on the past and the future
Lose my mind like a rabid ape.
– A. Garcia
Maybe it’s meant to be like one of those
Who dream and sleep at waking times
Of sorrows past
Of broken hearts
Of dreams and love unrequited
Of the many ways once proposed
Maybe it’s meant to be like one of those
Whose love dies unresolved.
– A. Gar
This one is whatever regurgitated out of me, just expressing thoughts and feelings, not polished or tinkered with, just as it is…
I remember walking down the street and thinking I had it made. Hot shit, back straight as a steel beam, forehead pointed ahead because I didn't give a fuck. Life has a mischievous way of reminding you, that if your feet are not planted flat on the ground, the finality, and consequence of death will slap you in the face with a cold rod. A misplaced brick, centuries old, dislodged from a wall and falls straight on your head and there you go. infinite darkness. How can I possibly be more clear than that? and yet you doubt what i tell you, show you. If I was ever so frightened with possibility, it had to be in another time, another place far away, so distant the sun’s warmth would collapse before it arrived. and yet you go with so much weight on your shoulders, a trip to the moon could do you a favor, and me I guess. It would be nice, to release and let go, take a small leap and have something carry you away. Its the trip up that would worry me, too much speed, fire and possible death for me. I can just imagine the explosion, something so loud bright and hot it would melt my molecules away. not even dust.
And really, who cares, every single one of us will be forgotten in a few generations, so many great people completely forgotten, their love, their pain and anguish, the ever present smiles and frowns. People who cared so much it hurt their soul and they caved in. So you let go and chase whatever is haunting you and realize it haunts no more because it never was. So I love you, what can I say, it just happened.
– A. Garcia
What do you think of when you look up at the sky, when in the early morning light the moon still shines bright?
Or when up above and all around is dark, blackness interrupted by specks set ablaze, stars so bright their energy flows after their demise. Does your mind go blank in wonder, astonishment gripping your heart, or clenching in fear for a moment lost? Do your thoughts drift to someone you long for, the hug that never materialized, to those eyes that never lingered on yours?
When your soul clenches with the heart’s deepest desires, your thoughts take you where you need to go.
So, what do you think of when we know we are standing under the same moon?
Why is it so hard? To bury pride, settle down and apologize.
To let it flow like the moon with the tides.
An egotistical wall blocked the view.
Never meant to leave you high and dry.
Time goes by, steady as the thoughts that run through our mind.
As you look at the stars, remember we are all under the same infinite sky. Don’t let it pass by until you hit that wall again; it comes for us all, the moment to die.
– A. Garcia
Humans, the only animal with an awareness of death and its horrible absoluteness; you would assume this awareness, this gift of consciousness would make us think many times over as to why we end life, especially the lives of the young and innocent, with such callousness and disregard for whats precious.
Humanity parades around death like chimps around a banana tree, invoking noble reasons for mayhem and destruction. Rationalizing that which has no rationale, attaching statistics and numbers to broken souls and abandoned hope.
That tree the chimps parade around gives them life; the tree of death that we hurriedly climb on, leaves only broken limbs, souls and hearts, crushed by the weight of our insufferable consciousness.
Your head up in the darkness of space
You are so distant, so aloof
Far away like Sagittarius A.
– A. Garcia
We look around every day, pondering the present, comparing it to the past, and we wonder how much things have changed. Yet, in the dormant entrails of our souls, all is the same. Our hearts and minds remain unchanged. The essence of humans remains unfazed; what that tells you of the human condition? It’s up to you to remove the shackles of culture and wave away the haze.
– A. Garcia